June 18, 2010

We arrived at LDS hospital around 5:40am. We sat in the waiting room for about 15 minutes and then got called back. I was more relaxed this morning just because i had an idea of what was going to happen, but not completely relaxed because i knew what was going to happen, sixes. We got into our room, no bed just a reclining chair, like the ones in the labor and delivery rooms, the chairs that are so uncomfortable, but add a pillow and a warm blanket and it was much better. Nurse Bobbi came in to start my IV and I told her i had a port. She says, "I am not sure how to do one of those, i better go get another nurse, then I can watch her and know for next time, okay?" Not okay. Bobbi then went on to assure me that she would practice on some oranges for next week when I come back. I am not okay with this and as i write this am dreading next Friday when I tell her I'm not comfortable with her poking me, chill out Sara.
I get wheeled over to the surgical room. This week they still have the paperwork wrong. Wrong doctor performing the procedure. Not cool. I of course freak out a little and then my doctor walks over to me and says hello. I am relieved he is there. I don't know if LDS makes a lot of mistakes like this but it is starting to get on my nerves.
The pain doc comes over and introduces herself, we chit chat and then she wheels me into the OR. I looked around the OR and listened to the nurses talking. They were saying that one nurse was going to train the other nurse, WHAT? I don't want people learning on me, especially during this procedure. One nurse starts putting me in the cross pose, seat belting me in, arms and all. Then i am asleep.
"Sara wake up." I'm in recovery. I notice there is no pain in my butt, thank goodness, but there is more pain in my urethra. What the hell did they do to me now? I raised my hand to get the nurses attention. I told her I had some pain and she asked if i wanted drugs, i said yes. I noticed the clock was almost 9am. Cool I am 15 minutes faster than last time. Now just to relax and enjoy the drugs and not think about anything until i can see Chris again.
My 15 minutes pass (ha), and i am wheeled out of recovery and down to radiation, floor 1. Marilyn and Shanna are there again, thank goodness familiar faces. And Chris, he is smiling and doesn't look too bored this time around. I get wheeled into the CT scan. Every week they need to do this to get a pic of the tumor and where they need to aim the radiation and how much and all that technical stuff. It only takes a few minutes and I am wheeled back into the hallway with Chris. Chris tells me a friend of ours, Jenna, was in the waiting room with him. Her aunt Viv has cancer and was getting a treatment. Crazy how cancer reunites people. No just reunites, even new friendships. We can talk to someone that has cancer and have this bond that you don't get with everyone else. We know what they are going through and can relate so much that we are instantly bonded. Anyway, I lay there in the hallway with Chris sitting my my side. We chit chat a little but i am so drugged up I just lay there. My friend Jenna comes over and lets me know everything is going to be great and gives me love. Time passes and the doc and nurses come out to wheel me in. I ask if Chris can go in the room to see what it looks like. First thing when I get wheeled in the room is the smell, it smells like burning, as Ralph would say. Chris kisses me goodbye for now and the doc, Dr. Sause, hooks me up to the machine. This time i need to "radiate" for 12 minutes. Oh joy 4 minutes longer, lets fry this sucker. While i lay in the room I think of all the things I'm going to do when this is over with. Everything will be different but better in every way.
Time passes and the door opens, everyone files back in the room. Dr. Sause tells me he likes to pull everything out quick so that it is over quick and i can recover quick. Sounds logical but i am hesitating a little. Nurse Marilyn tells me she had the pain doc give me extra drugs just for this part and i just relax and it really won't hurt that bad. I wish i would have known that in recovery because i wouldn't have asked for extra pain killers then, oh well, again. Surprisingly enough i felt little to no pain. Don't get me wrong, i could feel it but i really didn't care.
(I forgot to mention that my blood work came back showing i have anemia and i am losing too much blood. No duh, i have had the same period for the last four weeks. My body doesn't understand it needs to go into menopause so the doc wants me to start progesterone, oh joy.)
After the treatment, Marilyn got me sitting up and i tried to stand up to walk to get dressed but i couldn't. Probably the extra drugs and the anemia mixture thats making me so dizzy. She had to get a wheelchair. She wheeled me out the Chris and we went to the changing area. I sat on the toilet and went to the bathroom, oh the burning. Not the usual burning from the catheter, come to find out, the "training nurse" from the OR forgot to lube up the catheter before inserting it into my urethra, thanks LDS for providing the best care ever! Sorry so negative but when you are in the hospital this much i think i can complain a little. I got dressed and Chris wheeled me upstairs to the loading dock. It was so hot outside i thought i might melt. I was still feeling the pain meds and was completely exhausted from the lack of iron.
We get home and Auntie Jen has decided to clean all the windows. I am happy she is doing this. Sitting on the couch and looking through the dirty windows for the past 3 months was driving me crazy. Now to get the windows closed and turn on the AC because i am sweating and ready for nap time. I sleep for a while and then eat, then back to sleep again.
Saturday and Sunday i stay in bed sleeping or laying down because i have little to no energy.
Monday, i woke up at 8:30am and got breakfast and made myself go outside to do some much needed watering and weeding. Oh how good it feels to be outside. I stay in the shade for most of the morning. I love working in the garden, can't wait for the tomatoes to start coming on.
Much thanks to Michelle and Jill for mowing the lawn on Saturday.