Start the day at a wonderful performance for my daughter ellie at her school. So awesome to see her sing songs and have fun. she is a true free spirit.
Next off to radiation at 11:30 am and chemo at 1:30 pm. We get to radiation and do my first official radiation, i rocked it. Next off to the hospital cafeteria for a big meal with Chris. I got a huge sandwich with some snacks. I didn't want to go too crazy because i am not sure what chemo will do to my stomach.
1:30 pm came too soon. we went to chemo and checked in. we saw the doctor assistant and nurse. I get my temp, heart rate and weight. looks good, off to chemo. chemo is a big open area with lots of nice leather reclining chairs that make you so comfortable, but my thing is getting a cubbie and cornering it off and having me and chris both have lazy boys to sit it, kind of selfish but seriously there are a ton of chairs, i'll count them next time i'm there, no shortage. we sit in an awesome cubbie and get ready for the nurse, oh yeah, here come the water works from sara. i am terrified of IVs oh and chemo. it's going to happen because this is the treatment I have chosen so i sit there, but i still cry quietly. Chris comforts me and lets me know i am tough and if i'm not tough i am pretty good at faking it so start faking, not really but it sounded good. what would i do without Chris, be severely heartbroken and lost.
Nurse Stephanie comes in and greets us. she is very sweet and kind and is ready to get the ball rolling. first up, she takes my blood and starts the IV, i hate this part but i did it first try. Seriously can't believe it. This IV is started at 1:45pm and Stephanie does not come back until 2pm. Nurse lets me know she is off doing the blood work and making sure all my counts are good. 2pm Stephanie starts my anti nausea meds, i receive two little bags of meds, they take about 30 to 45 minutes. After that comes the saline bag which can take about 1 1/2 hours. During this time I am free to wander the chemo area, work on puzzles, eat, go to the bathroom and bother other patients and nurses. I am not allowed to leave the building, nice try sara. All IV meds sting in my veins so the nurse had to slow the rate down so it takes even longer, oh well, the kids are being taken care of and thats most of my worry. 4:50 pm rolls around and i finally get hooked up to the chemo. Not a good feeling going in my veins, burns and makes me sleepy sort of. I figure we won't get finished until after 6pm so i just sit back and relax. i make several trips to the bathroom. Chris leaves and gets prescriptions filled and I try to rest. I ended up closing the place. my first time and i'm already causing problems. Not really but that too entirely too long.
While leaving chemo I feel heavy and tired. Heavy like i have so much liquid in my body i can't get rid of it and physically tired. Tired of crying, tired of stressing and worrying about what its going to be like, and tired of missing my girls. i just want to get home and eat. But what do i want to eat, toast. lame. I had no appetite when i got home. Hopefully tomorrow will be better. oh did i mention I have 4 different pills to keep my from puking. Crazy how many drugs they can prescribe when i know of one earth ground herb that can cure all of these illnesses. Too bad i am still fighting off a wicked cough. later days.
Still can't believe i have cancer, hard to believe. i remember when I told my friend Tim I had it and I thought, "you're lying Sara, you shut your mouth and tell him that was a lie, but it was the truth," I just couldn't believe it.
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