Radiation went well. Off to chemo. Nurse Deuce took care of me today. she wasn't the best with getting the IV in, okay it took her two times. But it all worked out and I didn't cry. Yeah for being tough. The chemo burns in my veins. i wish i could just pull the iv out and run away. It wouldn't make anything better but it would stop hurting for a little while. Freaks me out that I am having poison put in my veins to fix me. wish i could just take an herb or potato juice and think real hard and get rid of it. i am so tired of thinking about having cancer my head hurts. me me me. i can't stand thinking about myself. i want to do other things like ride my bike, play with my kids, go on dates with my husband do service for someone who needs it. i can't wait for it to be over and get back to the life i have so good. I don't know how I could complain when my life gets back to normal, I will have no excuse. I will dance and jump for joy. I will take advantage of everything, and not let anything pass me up. I want to experience it and help others experience it. i never want to feel useless like this ever again.
goals
no more complaining about my clothes, physical features and not having something.
more adventures with the girls
more dates with chris
more sara chill time to recover from being so cool.
i want to evolve into something so beautiful and peaceful and i want to radiate that feeling to other people just by having them near me. I need the blueprints for this.
love love love everything and everyone, no more hating, disliking is an option, sorry, no one is perfect.
No comments:
Post a Comment